Prayer

My baby has lost his first tooth!! And today he lost his second!! I just cannot believe how quickly they grow up. One minute you are rocking him in the nursery during a middle of the night feeding, the next he has lost a tooth. Times passes by so quickly!

I did my second shot tonight. It took just as long as the first! I need to get past the mental aspect of it all. I was thinking this morning how crazy it is that I actually gave myself a shot. I mean, aren't you supposed to go to school for that?! Have a license or something! I am not nurse material!!

Rich was sharing some of his bible study with me last week, and there were several things that he said that I wanted to share on this blog. The teaching come from "The Message of the Sermon on the Mount" by John R.W. Stott.

"Ask, and it will be given you; seek and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For every one who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. Or what man of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him?"

First, his promises are attached to direct commands: Ask...seek...knock... These may deliberately be in an ascending scale of urgency. Richard Glover suggests that a child, if his mother is near and visible, asks; if she is neither, he seeks; while if she is inaccessible in her room, he knocks. Be that as it may, all three verbs are present imperatives and indicate that persistence with which we should make our requests known to God. Secondly, the promises are expressed in universal statements: for every one who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks, it will be opened.

Prayer sounds very simple when Jesus teaches about it (in the Sermon on the Mount speech). Just ask...seek...knock...and in each case you will be answered. This is a deceptive simplicity, however; much lies behind it. First, prayer presupposes knowledge. Since God gives gifts only if they accord with his will, we have to take pains to discover his will- by Scripture meditation and by the exercise of a Christian mind schooled by Scripture meditation. Secondly, prayer presupposes faith. It is one thing to know God's will; it is another to humble ourselves before him and express our confidence that he is able to cause his will to be done. Thirdly, prayer presupposes desire. We may know God's will and believe he can perform it, and still not desire it. Prayer is the chief means God has ordained by which to express our deepest desires. This is the reason why the 'ask-seek-knock' commands are in the present imperative and in an ascending scale to challenge out perseverance. Thus, before we ask, we must know what to ask for and whether it accords with God's will; we must believe God can grant it; and we must genuinely want to receive. Then the gracious promises of Jesus will come true.

Rich and I had a good conversation about this portion of the book. I told him that I believe all of this, and I pray this way, but my hang up is that I don't feel that I know what God's will is in this situation. Well as I re-type this tonight, several verses in the bible stick out in my mind.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.~ Jeremiah 29:11

May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.~ Psalm 20:4

Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.~ Psalm 37:4

12Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. 13But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.~ 1 Peter 4:12-13

I have always envisioned His glory being revealed in a child for us. That has always been my hope and my prayer. The portion of the bible lesson above tells us to seek God's will in the words of our only line of communication with Him, the Bible. My Bible tells me that God loves me and that I am his child. My Bible tells me that he wants to give me the desires of my heart. I am going to believe that this is God's will for me and my family. I believe that God wants me to have this child. I believe that He would not burden my heart so strongly, only to have it ultimately broken. If I believe this 100%, I put myself at a large risk of being let down. Perhaps that is what has held me back. Thus, before we ask, we must know what to ask for and whether it accords with God's will; we must believe God can grant it; and we must genuinely want to receive.

My Heavenly Gracious Father,

I ask you tonight to bless my family with a child. I ask you to place that child in my womb this month, created through the deep love that Rich and I share. Not created through science or medicine, but created by you and only you, the giver and taker of life. I ask for a brother or sister that Kaitlyn can love and be an example to. I ask for a brother or sister that Khloe will help nurture and cuddle. I ask for a brother or sister that Drew will be able to be a big brother to. I ask for a child that Rich and I can drink up like a tall glass of water after a long days work. A child that we can hold together and marvel at your wonderful creation. A child that I can look at at see yet another combination of myself and my wonderful husband. A child that I can smell and nurse and treasure each and every moment with. I ask for a health pregnancy. I ask for excited moments when my children get to feel Mommy's belly as their sibling kicks. I ask for ten tiny fingers and ten tiny toes. I ask for a miracle Father, just one more miracle. I know that this is in accordance with your will. Your Word tells me. I believe that You are the ONLY one that can make this happen Lord. I know that you are the orchestrator of my life. We are ready to receive your blessing Lord. We have waited and waited, and we are ready. Please send us the miracle that we have been waiting for Father. It is in Jesus' precious name that I ask these things~ Amen