Another devotion to share... The First Desperate Housewife

By Micca Campbell

Genesis 39:7 “And it came to pass after these things, that his master’s wife cast her eyes upon Joseph; and she said, ‘Lie with me.’” (KJV)

Devotion: I admit it. I used to be a Soap fan when I was a teenager. Lured by the romance and drama, I assumed real life as an adult would play out in the same fashion. Boy, was I wrong! While there’s plenty of drama in my life, romance is something that has to be scheduled most of the time. Real life isn’t like what we see on TV or read about in romance novels. In fact, these images can be dangerous to both single and married people alike. When our ideas about life leave us dissatisfied, we can easily be tempted to look at other options. Soap operas, pornography and romance novels encourage risky behavior that can lead to sin. Often married people convince themselves that just looking or dreaming about being with someone other than their spouse is okay as long as they don’t actually do anything about it. Likewise, some single people feel that they can lust after another as long as they remain “physically pure.”

Jesus said, “’But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart’” (Matthew 5:28 NIV).

That goes for us gals, too. I imagine that Potiphar’s wife could be described as the “first desperate housewife.” She didn’t have TV or a romance novel to read. She had something better, Joseph. He was the head workman in charge who conveniently lived in her home and was pleasing to her sight. Unknown to Joseph, he was about to become the prey of a desperate housewife. This Egyptian woman didn’t happen to notice Joseph one day and then on the spur of the moment, ask Joseph to lie down with her. No. Our key verse tells us she “cast her eyes upon Joseph” and spoke with him day after day. In other words, she watched him, she flirted with him, and she dreamed about him until her sinful thoughts led to action. Her husband ought to have been to her a “covering of the eyes” from all others. Instead, with the lust in her heart, she was daring and shameless in her sin. How do we keep from falling into such sin? We should follow Job’s example. "’I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl [or boy]’” (Job 31:1).

We each have a great need and responsibility to make a covenant with our eyes. Remember that children’s song often sang in Sunday school ... “Be careful little eyes what you see? Oh, be careful little eyes what you see. For the Father up above is looking down in love. Oh, be careful little eyes what you see. ”We can protect our eyes by choosing not to watch movies, pornography or TV shows that glamorize sexuality and can lead us into temptation. Our own husbands should be the covering of our eyes that protect us from looking at others. Besides, the grass is not always greener on the other side. I also realize that we are human and we make mistakes. No one is perfect this side of heaven. That’s why it’s so important to be on guard. Another way to safe guard ourselves is to commit to taking hold of any lustful thoughts and quickly put them out of our minds. Temptation is not a sin. It’s when we dwell on the temptation that we are led to sinful actions. Don’t be like Potiphar’s wife. Ask God to give you “eyes” for the spouse you already have.


Dear Lord, Forgive me for where I have fallen short. I commit to You today to take every lustful thought captive so that it doesn’t lead me into sin. May all my thoughts be pleasing to You, in Jesus’ Name, Amen.


Related Resources:
What a Husband Needs from His Wife by Melanie Chitwood
Becoming the Woman of His Dreams by Sharon Jaynes
Blessing Your Husband by Debra Evans (I added this one because a friend read it and shared some of it and it looks like a great book!)

Application Steps: If you are having trouble in this area, find a trustworthy accountability partner who you can share honestly with about your struggles. Agree to hold each other accountable to God’s truths and to pray for one another. When these thoughts enter your mind, turn to God’s Word, prayer and your accountability partner.

Reflections: In what ways can you protect your eyes from lustful images? Practice thinking on what is true, right and pure. Are you addicted to soap operas or romance novels? If so, what steps will you take today to move away from this stronghold in your life?
Power Verses: 2 Corinthians 10:5, “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” (NIV) Philippians 4:8, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.” (NIV)

Some of you know, some of you don't, that my marriage has been impacted this year with the issues spoke about in this devotion. What started out as an innocent visit to a WWE website very quickly turned into a pornography addiction. It took less than three months. It went from once a week to every day. It went from two websites to hundreds. In less than three months. It is so important for all of us to guard our hearts and our eyes. Thoughts in your head can quickly turn into actions and soon you are looking back at you life wondering what happened. We were fortunate that God loves us enough to put an end to this addiction in an abrupt and immediate way. He slapped Rich with a DIU, which lead me to reach out to a friend for help, who told me what to do to handle my fears about the DUI, which lead to a confession from my husband about what I would find on his computer. We are fortunate that God loves us and cares about our marriage so much that he stopped Rich before his addiction could turn into something physical. Rich knew he needed to stop, he tried, but he couldn't do it on his own, and he was to ashamed to reach out and ask for help. God knew. God helped.

If you are reading this right now thinking ‘oh that would NEVER happen to me, my husband loves me, we have a great marriage’, please do not think that something like this cannot happen to you. I thought that my marriage was rock solid. I thought that I was the only woman that my husband had eyes for. I thought that God invested so much time building my marriage over the past two years that he would protect it from harm. It can happen to your marriage.

I am still working through the hurts. We are still in counseling. I found a lot of help and information in the book I Surrender All: Rebuilding A Marriage Broken by Pornography by Clay and Renee Crosse. This book is amazing and has helped me a lot. Here is their site... http://www.holyhomes.org/default.aspx

Something so simple as a thought can ruin your marriage. You could wake up and find a fatherless home, a child’s broken heart, your dreams gone. Guard your hearts.

The devotion got me thinking...

I have a friend that posts daily devotions on my Infertility Board. Hope is an amazing Christian with amazing strength. She shared this and it touched me:

Was It Lack of Faith that Caused Him to Die?
(Edited for sake of space)
By Sharon Glasgow

“Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him. Even so, I will defend my own ways before Him. He also shall be my salvation.” Job 13: 15 (NKJ)

Devotion:
Why is it that some people are healed and some are not? People were healed miraculously in the Bible and others lost their families like Job. We see Stephen in the book of Acts who was actively preaching Christ and was stoned to death. It surely was not lack of faith that caused Stephen to die, nor was God incapable of saving Job’s family. We yearn so desperately for answers to why the horrible things happen, but God doesn’t come down and explain. Could it be sin standing in the way of our prayers? Could it be a lack of faith? Or could it just be God’s will, which we often don’t fully comprehend? We simply won’t always know why certain things have to happen in our life - until the end of time when God wipes the tears from every eye and makes all things new. Then and only then will we know the answers, and fairness will reign. Until that day we must trust in God that He knows best. Have faith that God can heal, and does heal. But trust Him when He doesn’t answer your prayers the way you prayed. I don’t believe lack of faith or sin had anything to do with the loss of Job’s family or Stephen’s life. May Job’s life speak to your heart in that he trusted God even in the midst of his agony and didn’t lose his faith in his mighty God. If you or someone you know is sick or needs a miracle, pray believing that God will work a miracle. I have witnessed the miraculous power of prayer over the sick many times and I know that God can do all things. I also know that you can trust Him no matter what the outcome is.

Dear Lord, Help me to trust you even in the valley of the shadow of death. Lift me up when I am weak and help me to be strong. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Related Resources: When You’re Running on Empty by Cindi McMenamin

Application Steps: Take time to write your prayers in a journal. You will be amazed to look back and see how God’s hand was with you all along, even though He didn’t seem to be answering for long periods of time. Write past prayers answered, it will encourage you today. Reflections: Is there someone in your life going through the valley of the shadow of death? How can you walk along side of them and help carry them through this hard time?

Power Verses: Philippians 1:19-20, “For I know that this will turn out for my deliverance through your prayer and the supply of the Spirit of Jesus Christ, according to my earnest expectation and hope that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ will be magnified in my body, whether by life or death.” (NKJ)

James 5: 13-14, “Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing psalms. Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him will oil in the name of the Lord.” (NKJ)

This devotion really spoke to me. How many times have I questioned God choices for my life and others? I remember a huge one was when Rich lost his job in 2003. Four years later I look back and see God with us and working through that time. I ask myself why God has chosen to lead my husband into an addiction that could ruin our marriage after he took so many years to help us repair our marriage. I ask myself why a mother would drown or hang her children, but God won't give me another one. I beg and plead for the life of an unborn boy that is in organ failure at 24 weeks maturity. His mother could not get pregnant and had IVF at the age of 39. She is now pregnant with twins and has been told that the boy will die and may put her into pre-mature labor with her daughter. Why give her a child, just to take him away before he even takes his first breath?

As I was praying last night for healing for my friends Trish and Becky as they go through their bible study I realized something. At first I asked God that they would be completely healed from all of their past hurts and that they would find answers and hope in this study that they are doing. Then I thought that perhaps "completely healed" was a bit much to ask, so I asked that God would give them the tools that they need to begin to work through some past hurts and begin to move on and repair their hearts and fears. Then I wondered if any of us would ever really be “completely healed.”

The conclusion that I came to last night in the middle of my prayer was that I don’t think that we will find complete healing this side of heaven. I think that there are demons that you will struggle with your whole earthly life. (That gives you so much hope, right?) I think that there are many, many whys that will not ever be answered in this lifetime. I may never know why God has made my life a constant struggle until I see Him face to face and ask Him. That doesn’t give me much comfort, but it does give me understanding. I realize that I may never have all of the answers, but I can only hope and pray that each day brings a little more peace and understanding to each of us in whatever situation we find ourselves in at that time.

Back in the saddle again

My friend Talena had a baby. Annaca Raine was born on Father's Day, June 17th. She weighed 6lbs, .7oz and is 17.7 inches long. I held her... she is this big ( )!!! I want one!!! I had all but given up on the dream.

Holding little Annaca yesterday just tugged at my heartstrings and made me realize that I am not quite ready to let go of that dream. I feel like I am close, but not totally ready. I do feel that God will resolve those feelings soon. I feel like I am close to an answer, I feel like I am close to either a baby, or acceptance that there are no more babies for us. Soooooooooooo....

I called the RE's office this morning and had them refresh me on my "plan of action". Rich and I talked this morning and we are going to give it all we've got for the next 4-6 months and if there is no baby then we will throw in the towel. Our kids are getting older every day and we don’t want a huge age difference. Also I have a little princess that is about to enter her pre-teen years with her younger sister right on her heals. I think that pre-teen girls have just about as much neediness as a newborn, and I don’t want to have to juggle both! I do not want to be dealing with the hormones of two teenagers and colic of a newborn at the same time. So I think that we will give it until the end of the year, and then Rich will go in for the big snip snip! I start temping again tomorrow, using the fertility monitor and call the RE’s office with ovulation. Then I will have an u/s to look and see what is going on in there at O time. At the end of the cycle I will have a biopsy to check the uterine lining and make sure it is in good shape and thick enough to support an embryo. Hopefully we will have some answers at the end of this cycle. She did review the HSG and said that the left tube is open but she could not tell about the right. I’m sure she will recommend to repeat the HSG, I’m not sure I want to do that, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. So I am a bit excited to get going again. The break has been really really nice though. No stressing, no temping, no POAS! I hope that I can go about this without becoming overly obsessed!

Rich and I are still in counseling. We are still working on things. I have had some deep hurts recently in relationships with friends and some with family. Life has been a bit crazy and overwhelming. A friend shared a piece of scripture with me yesterday that I printed and have on my desk: 1 Peter 1:6-7 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith-of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire- may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. I like that verse and I was looking at it today, I realized how close it is to the verse I have kept very close to my heart for the past few years in regard to my infertility journey, 1 Peter 4 12-13 Do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering as though something strange were happening to you, but rejoice that you participate in the suffering of Christ so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. I guess I have to trust that one way or another God’s plan in all of this will be revealed to me and it will all make sense. I can’t wait for that day!

I was at Women of Faith last weekend and took the verse Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength. and Matthew 19:26 Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." There have been many things that I thought were impossible this year. It has been a hard year. These verses keep me grounded and speak the truth to my heart when Satan is trying to take advantage of my weaknesses.

I will keep you updated on our progress.