Peter 4:12-13- Do not be surprised at the painful trial that you are suffering as though something strange were happening to you, but rejoice that you participate in the suffering of Christ so that you will be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.
Living it and Loving it.
I finally feel official! Our license came in the mail on Friday. It is dated October 10/28/12-10/28/16 so that means we have been on the roster and/or in the system since 10/28. I guess this is a bit more of a waiting game than I anticipated. I thought we would get a placement quickly. I need to remember that nothing ever goes the way I thought it would.
Our Friday Family movie night continues. I had given the kids invitations along with their golden Polar Express ticket. In the wake of the horrific events in CT on Friday I wanted to make things extra special. I called Rich and asked him to clear the kids our of the family room and tell them they couldn't come in. I asked him to hang some extra Christmas lights and make the night extra special. I stopped to get the pizza on the way home, I had planned a few Christmas games and a sweet Christmas treat. It was a very fun night and I love making these great memories. The Christmas games were quick and easy as was the treat. I would love to share so that you may organize a fun event for your family as well.
Christmas games
Fill a tray with random Christmas items. Stocking, candy cane, pinecone, chocolate chip, candy, ornament, snowflake, santa and some regular items...a watch, a spoon, a red pen, etc. Give your family 30 seconds to see the tray and remember all the items that they can. Then remove the tray and give them pen & paper and tell them to write all they can remember. We also did a word scramble like this one...http://www.sciencekids.co.nz/quizzes/wordscrambles/christmas.html.
Christmas Treat
Before we ate we lined a bar pan or cookie sheet with gram crackers, melted 1 cup of butter and one cup of brown sugar in a pan and brought to a boil. We then poured the mixture over the gram crackers and baked in the oven for 8 minutes. We let that cool while we watched part of our movie. We then melted two large Hershey bars in a glass bowel in the microwave and poured that over the cooled gram crackers. We played a game and set that in the fridge to cool. We watched more of the movie then returned to play the other game and eat our delicious snack. Very easy and a very inexpensive night. Tis the season for making memories.
How in the world can it be December? How did I miss November? I can't believe that the Christmas Season is upon us already! 13 days till Christmas?? Less than two weeks?? Wow! I need to get my Christmas butt in gear! We hosted a Vendor Open House at our house during the Delavan Christmas Tour of Homes and my life has been consumed with that for the passed few weeks. Our kitchen project was slowly moving along and wasn't finished until 2 days before the event when it was supposed to be finished two week before!! Last week consisted of much rushing and decking the halls! Alas, Saturday came and the Open House was successful. Pictures to come. Now, my brain is clear and my plate has been cleared with a new one put in front of me to fill. Kinda like a holiday buffet if you will.
Last weekend we went on a hunt for the perfect tree. We usually get a short needle tree (the kind I like) but the kids begged to get a long needle this year so I compromised. I had this scene in my head about how our tree hunting would go, and the scene that played out and the scene in my mind did not quite match up. I guess we all strive to be "that perfect family", well at least I know I do. The one with the happy smiling faces and the matching sweaters all strolling through the tree farm hand in hand singing Christmas carols...well that was not quite how our tree adventure went. The kids were fighting, and yelling and talking to loudly. One wanted this tree, one wanted that tree and I wanted the other tree. We couldn't agree and there was just grumbling and grouching. Things did not improve when we got home to put up the tree. It was not a picture perfect event, but I took the pictures anyway. :)
Kait was determined to cut the tree this year.
The end result was a beautiful tree, if not a beautiful memory. I think it's important to give ourselves a break every once in a while. It's ok to have off days and it's ok if every memory isn't perfect. It's what makes us a family and I am thankful for mine, even if I have two moody teenage girls and a preteen with ADHD who tests my limits every day.
I have had the opportunity to watch my very favorite Christmas movie...
ELF! I love this movie!
Rich & started to watch this classic, but were interrupted. I'll catch that one yet this year!
Foster care update...things continue to be unorganized and frustrating. We got the call about possibly taking the almost 3 year old boy and never had confirmation on the status of the placement until five days later. Foster mom changed her mind and didn't want him moved after all. That seems to be what is best for the boy at this point, and I knew it would be a difficult decision for the foster mother and I prayed a lot for her. I was ok with the news and trust that God has a plan for us. It was still frustrating that the agency hadn't spoken with the foster mom before they told us about the possible placement, but I'm coming to expect this nonsense from them. I did ask for a call from the actual case worker to go over the outcome, and she never took the time to return my call. I called today and spoke with our licensing worker and expressed my need for better communication. I feel that she heard what I was saying and can feel my frustration so I hope that will improve the communication. She did confirm that our license is actually in the system and approved and said we would get a copy in the mail soon.
I'm trying very hard to slow down over the next few weeks. Do some crafts, bake some cookies, flip through a magazine, watch some movies. I hope that you will take the time to do the same. Enjoy the Christmas season with your loved ones. Be blessed.
I knew when we started this journey into Foster Parenting that it would be a wild ride. I have seen "the state" at work as I have watched my mom deal with things for the passed 28 years of her foster care experience. I knew there would be frustrations. Knowing things and processing them are two different emotions. I called my licensing worker on Tuesday and left a message. I called her supervisor and left a message. I'm still trying to figure out where things are with our license. I never heard back from either of them. Yesterday at 10:40am I had a 13 minute conversation with my licensing worker and a case worker. I saw her name come up on my caller ID and assumed she was returning my call from Tuesday. I answer and she says "Hi Kari, it's _____, I wanted to talk to you about a referral." My mind moves very fast. I can have about 100 thoughts in 2 seconds. My first thought is that I just cannot believe these people. They can't return a call to let me know the status of my license, but they are calling me with a referral. Unbelievable. So I start asking the standard questions, how old is he? How long has he been in care? How many homes has he been in? Does he have any medical issues? And she puts his caseworker on the line. The caseworker was very nice and answered all of my many questions. She said that his current foster mom had given a written notice today. She gave me all of the info and said she would be in touch. That was almost 24 hours ago and I have heard nothing. I am not good at being patient. I am a planner and I want to know what the next step is. I'm trying not to call them, trying to wait for them to call me, but I'm losing restraint. I'm trying not to get my hopes up, as this is the fourth referral we have had, just the second "official" referral. None of the others has come through so I'm trying not to get too excited.
We STILL do not have our license. I truly just cannot believe it. I never, in a million years, thought that I would be close to December 1st and not have any new children in our home. Never did I think that I would be this close to December 1st and not even have our license. The last communication I had with them was on November 15th, I was finally in touch with our licensing worker. She said that the paperwork was sent to her supervisor in Champaign (yeah, yeah, the check's in the mail) and that we should hear news soon. She said that if they were to get a referral that matched our criteria that we would be considered for placement. I'm not sure I believe that. I think the thing that frustrates me the most is that I feel the licensing worker is not being honest with me. If she would have given me realistic time lines in the beginning, I wouldn't be so frustrated. She makes promises, to appease me I'm sure, but then she cannot follow up with her end of the bargain. I would much rather her just be honest and say "the paperwork will take four weeks to process from this point', instead of 'we will rush things through for you and scan things in and you will be licensed in two days'. Then hide from me and not return any of my phone calls. I would have much rather her tell us to go ahead and take the 9 week PRIDE course 40 minutes from our house because it will take six months to obtain a license instead of telling us that if we break our necks and pull 16 hour days and do the classes in 5 weeks she's sure that we can be licensed shortly after the class finishes. Here we are eight weeks after we completed our PRIDE training and we STILL don't have even a license!!! I can't help but wonder how long it will be from the time we actually get our license until we have a placement. I wonder if this agency even gets referrals. If they handle their referrals anything like they handle their licensing, I'm sure DCFS doesn't want to deal with them and would rather give referrals to other agencies.
I have called both the licensing agent and her supervisor today and left messages for an update.
I was praying this morning about this situation. Again praying for patience, again praying for children that are currently in foster care and children that are in their homes but being abused or neglected. I was praying for children that are out there that will be coming into our home and then I wondered if that will even happen at all. I wondered if all of this delay is just God's way of telling us that these are not the plans He has for us. And I prayed, again, for His guidance and His will to be done. I prayed that He would make me His tool and to simply have me ready. Ready to do His work, whatever that may be.
I'm getting that fuzzy feeling. You know the one that comes around every year about this time. When your heart and mind are full of jingle bells and big red bows. Yes, Christmas. I'm feeling very excited about Christmas this year. I'm not sure why, becasue it will surley be a different kind of Christmas for us this year. Every year for several years we have taken a trip at Christmas instead of giving our kids gifts. We decided long ago that it was silly to spend money on gifts for them when they did not NEED anything. We decided to give them memories instead. We have taken them to Mexico, Jamaica, Punta Cana...it has been wonderful. I look forward to that time of rest and relaxation. My husband has travled with his job, being gone two weeks then home for the weekend and this was an important time for us to be together as a family and enjoy eachother. Last year it was not 100% enjoyable. The kids were a bit nasty to eachother and had a bit of an entitlement attitude. We decided then that we would not take a trip this year. So this year will be a bit tricky. Again, I do not want to spend money on the kids when they don't NEED anything. I would rather spend money on a charity or donating to other families or organizations. I think that this idea of Random Acts Of Christmas is a great idea! However...IF we have foster children in ourhome, I want them to be able to experience gits under the tree and the happiness of unwrapping Christmas morning. It wouldn't be fair to have gifts for foster kids and not my kids...so we are considering doing this...
I would really like to be doing this...
Me & the kids, Jamaica 2008
but finances and attitudes don't allow for it this year. Hopefully next year!
Things in foster care land continue to be very frustrating. It was two weeks ago when our clearances came from Springfield. I was under the impression that we would have our license shortly there after. I STILL have not had a conversation with our licensing worker about what is going on. She has yet to return any of my calls. I called again this Monday and Tuesday. On Tuesday afternoon I was frustrated enough to call her supervisor. The supervisor explained that once she had the clearances she mailed them to Lincoln to our licensing agent. Then she put the whole packet together and sent it to her supervisor in Champaign. Then that supervisor signs off on it and mails it back to the supervisor in Springfield where she enters it into the system in Springfield and then we are licensed. Doesn't that just sound like craziness? You would think in the world of modern technologuy that system could be much simpler. So as of yesterday the supervisor in Springfield did not have the paperwork. As of today, I have not heard back from our licesing worker. It's all very frustrating. I thought I would have a house full at Halloween. Now here it is almost Thanksgiving. We usually get our Christmas tree the Saturday after Thanksgiving, but I am hesitant because if we do get foster kids I would love for them to be a part of cutting down the tree and decorating it. What kid doesn't deserve to be a part of that?! Our kitchen is currently in our living room because of a huge remodel so I think we will wait a bit to get our tree. I am hosting an event on December 8th, so I will have to have things done by then. Perhaps it will be after the first of the year before we have any extra kiddos with us. Only the good Lord knows.
I had to share this photo of my girls from the weekend. They spent the night at my mom's house and she was teaching them to crochet. It's about the age when she taught me. I love it. I hope to make a lot of my Christmas gifts this year. I find so many great ideas on Pinterest. This is my gift ideas board here. Pop over and get some ideas!
Hopefully next time I come here to post news I will be a licensed foster parent! Hey, a girl can dream!
Family movie night continures to be a success! Last week was carmel apples and a special Starbucks Carmel Apple Spice. Can you guess what the movie was? The hot Carmel Apple spice drink is soooo good and really easy to make! Did you know that you can buy Cinnamon Dolce syrup right from Starbucks?? For the recipe...heat apple juice on the stove or in the microwave. Pour into fuzzy cups, add one teaspoon of dolce sauce and top with a dollop of whipped cream! YUM!! I had someone home sick last week...
This guy was so interested in the presidential election! I love this picture! I think he should run for president!
The girls could not decide what to be for halloween. They ended up being a princess ballerina and a princess tap dancer.
This guy was Willie Wonka and his friend was an Oompa Loompa!
My mom had surgery last week so I offered to help out and take some of her kids for the day. I sure had my hands full! I had 7 kids! Two toddlers, two with ADHD and two teenagers!! Overall it was a fun day! I thought it was great practice for my foster care days ahead.
Nothing is happening on the foster care front. We got word last Tuesday that our clearances were in and that my licensing worker was going to have the supervisor scan in our license and we should have it on Wednesday. I didn't hear anything from them so I called the office Friday and she wasn't in. I called again on Monday and she wasn't in. I called her cell and she told me that she wasn't in the office but would get the license scanned in on Tuesday. Tuesday she had an emergency and would have to get back with me. We were approached last Thursday by a friend about taking a placement of a newborn that she was associated with. I gave her the agency's contact information but never heard another thing. Still waiting...
We are one step closer. I woke up humming this song this morning and I knew that we would get news today. Final clearance came through yesterday from Springfield. Our homestudy is complete and all information has been sent for final data entry. Our licensing worker says we should have the license in our hands in about a week. One step closer.
I feel like my life starts on Friday night. My Monday through Friday is consumed with a job that is very stressful and draining and I often feel like I am holding my breath until I get to 4pm on Friday...and the I can exhale and breathe and enjoy my life. The family and I are LOVING family movie night. This week was a double feature of Madagascar 3 and Beetle Juice. We had hot coco and delicious sugar cookies for our treat.
Saturday was a very scheduled day. Lots of errands to run in the morning, and a tea with my step-mom in the afternoon. We visited Twigs Market in the morning to deliver our homemade laundry soap that we sell there. You can find our Etsy store here: The Dixon Connection. The kids and I love this little market! They have so many wonderful things to see. Bunnies and chickens and goats and ducks for the kids to play with, fresh produce, antiques, handmade items...it's a wonderful place and worth the drive out!
After deliveries we picked up grandma and headed out to The Mackinaw Tea Room for lunch. They were having their holiday open house and there were beautiful things to see and very delicious things to eat!
I did manage to find some time on Sunday to start clearing out the dining room in preparation of our new floors going in. I came across some old pictures of the kids. It seems like it was just a few months ago when they were this little!!
The weekend had a perfect ending with a Sunday dinner at my parents' house roasting hot dogs and eating smores and apple crisp!
We have heard nothing new in regards to our foster care license. It is my understanding that the Central Office of Licensing in Springfield underwent a large audit in August & September and that is why all of the clearances out of Springfield are being delayed. I am just trying to be patient and trust in the Lord's timing.
We have stolen an idea from this blog and I am loving it! Last Friday night was our second Family Movie night. We made homemade carmel apples and a sparkling apple cider that I found on my beloved Pinterest. The movie was Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Drew ahs decided he will be Willie Wonka for halloween.
Saturday was a planned trip to Six Flags to enjoy Fright Fest. We get season passes every year but have never made it down for Fright Fest. It was a good time. It was me and four kids, and Khloe was terrified of the monsters and we lost Drew at one point for a minute and a half that seemed like 6 years, but overall we had a good time.
Sunday was our annual trip to the pumpkin patch. We didn't have Bella this year and we missed her.
I sure have some beautiful children.
Sunday night was dinner at my parents' house and some pumpkin carving!
There was a little time in between all of the activity for Daddy to catch a few zzzzz. I couldn't help but take his picture. He's such a handsome guy.
Nothing exciting to report in the Fostercare area. Our agency is claiming that clearances out of Springfield are backed up and taking an extened amount of time. I'm just frustrated with the whole thing. Others that were in class with us have gotten their license. Many people have told us to change agencies, for now I'm just trying to be patient and trust in the Lord's timing.
We had a great weekend. We kicked off the break from school and work with a Family Movie Night. I made a fun invitation and taped it to each kids' bedroom door (because I didn't make it in time to mail it).
We had homemade carmel corn. Oh YUM!! You can find the recipe here. It is a challenge to find a family friendly movie to share. We ended up watching Home Alone 3.
Drew & Khloe ran their best times in their Cross County Sectional on Saturday! Khloe finished the year at 14.59 and Drew finished his year at 13.10. So proud of them both for doing an amazing job on their first year!!
We had another beautiful fall weekend here. This weekend it was Drew's turn to have his special day out with Mom & Dad. He wanted to go go-carting and he needed to get his shoes for basketball. It was a total "boy" kind of day!
Daddy getting ready to race!
Me in my dune buggy!
The kids spent some fun times at grandma's house. Fishing, raccoon hunting, cooking and hanging clothes on the line. I made some yummy chicken & rice soup and banana bread. I ended the weekend at a mom's prayer group where we prayed over each other's children and the needs of our school and faculty. My kids need prayer. Drew is a challenge to me and a bigger challenge to his teacher and classmates. Kait is going through the age where friends are making different choices and she is feeling torn. Khloe is feeling 13 and flexing her attitude Independence. I set this as the wallpaper on my phone. We all need to pray this for our kids.
It's Monday, and I am heading back into the work week, still clinging to the fall bliss of the weekend. I think I have decided that fall is my favorite season. I used to think spring, but I think fall is taking over. I love this time of year when the air cools and the leaves change. I love all of the oranges and yellows. I was walking to meet friends for dinner on Saturday and I was soaking in the trees and the fallen leaves and the blue sky and the perfect day. As I grow older, I am better at slowing down and appreciating the moment. Lately, I have been craving a slower pace. Time at home. Time to catch up and then relax with a book or a show on tv. Just being thankful for that moment and thanking God for blessing me with so much in my life. Loving fall things like the annual bonfire at Grandma's and drinking too many Chai Lattes.
I can't help but to remember this time last year. I had just had a hysterectomy & both ovaries removed. I was home, I was resting. Each day I would get the kids off to school and then sit in my chair on the porch and read. I took naps, visited with my friend Nancy who came over and took good care of me. I did fall crafts and flipped through magazines. It was a peaceful time. It has been a mostly pain free year and I do not regret my decision to have the surgery.
After the disappointment of last week, and the process of obtaining our license in general, I was confirming to myself my decision to not contact the agency until we had received our license in the mail. I thought..."I'm just going to enjoy my simple life while I still have it." For those of you that know us, I'm sure that you would agree that we don't necessarily live a 'simple life'. We are a very active family with three very active kids. We usually have some sort of activity scheduled every night of the week. It's rare that you will find us at home or with a blank date on our calendar. If we are at home, I am cooking or cleaning or crafting or making laundry soap. I couldn't tell you the last time that I was home for an entire day. I couldn't tell you a time when all five of us didn't leave the house for an entire day. That has probably never happened. We are always on the go and we like it that way. Our life is simple to me. I know the schedule. I post it on the fridge so that everyone knows what is going on that week. I know my kids and their attitudes and emotions. I know the routine, who needs to be where when. Once we have a child/children placed with us, that will all change.
This weekend was good.
I sent out a text on Friday...Sunday Dinner at our house. Celebrating fall with soup, bread and apple crisp. Be there or be talked about! Drew and I made apple crisp together. I love that he will do things like this with me.
We had our girl for another sleepover. We love her so much!
It was a good weekend. Too short. I did get one room decluttered and I swept the floors, I didn't get them mopped. I think that can be done by Wednesday night. I did find some fall stuff and get it put up. The goal for this week is to get the entry cleared. I have been piling things there for a while and they need to find new homes. Our week isn't as busy as the passed few since Carnival is over and Cross Country and Golf are coming to an end. I challenge you to slow down this week and enjoy fall.
I will leave you with this video. Every time I get frustrated, scared, confused, unsure about this adventure that is Foster Care...we sing this song at church and I feel like it's God singing peace into my soul and reminding me that this is NOT ABOUT ME.
